My POV: Our time in Marttinen

20.01.2026

Hey, readers! What’s up? How are you doing?

Happy New Year, by the way! The holidays are gone, and we all embark on a new adventure this year. How did Christmas treat you? Did you have fun?

The guys and I spent the holidays in our hometowns or with relatives.

I didn’t go back to Germany, where I live. I traveled to Spain because I had been invited to a wedding, and it was so wonderful! If you remember, I was born and raised there, so returning to the place where I was born and spent my whole childhood was amazing.

I kind of believe that I had already moved on, but once I stepped into my town, every memory I had buried deep in my mind and heart resurfaced like a wave crashing into the rocks of a beach. It felt strange and painful, honestly. Everything in the town has changed. The feeling is the same, and most people also remain the same, but the development in the town is irrefutable. The streets I walked when I was a child didn’t look the same, and with that, the feeling of safety and security was gone. The place I once called home felt like a whole new world I could hardly grasp. However, not everything was so blue. Reuniting with my childhood friends was a blessing. I can’t even describe how it was to be able to hug them in real life and talk to them face to face, finally!

Although it’s been almost six years since I left my life in Spain behind, I’m lucky to say that I kept in contact with my closest childhood friends. The distance keeps us apart from each other, but our connection has never been stronger. So, yeah. I had a beautiful time in Spain. Not to mention how wonderful the wedding was. I got to wear my pretty traditional dresses, put on makeup, and wear high heels. I ate delicious food, danced with my friends… You all have no idea how much I missed it! Believe me, my heart, my soul, my body, and my mind needed that.

Okay, now I have completely blurted out too many details, and it wasn’t even what I wanted to tell you today (sorry). Anyways, let’s go back to Marttinen's topics.

After coming back to Finland from our vacation, we wanted to meet in Helsinki to spend some time together in the capital city. SOOOO MAAANNNYYY problems happened, that only four of us made it to be together in Helsinki, but that’s a story for another time. Spoiler: I wasn’t one of the four.

Well, what I really wanted to tell you today is about the very first time we arrived here at Marttinen. I think to say it was a special day is an understatement.

The day I arrived in Helsinki, I remember thinking: “What the heck, it's not even that cold.” Mind you, it was the beginning of October, but the me from the past didn’t know better. Now, we have January, and I know better than to say Finland is not even cold. That day was terrible. My journey started the day before at 10 pm and finished the next day around 8 pm. Not only did I feel disgusting, but the lack of sleep and the hunger were unbearable. However, during the day, as I kept meeting the new people who were going to be my teammates for the next seven months, the day became easier to deal with.

At some point, we all met each other on the way to Marttinen. Then, we waited for the taxi to pick us up from Parkano and take us to Marttinen, the building that turned into our workplace and home. The ride took 45 Minutes, and even though we were exhausted, the vibe between us clicked instantly. The moment we arrived at Marttinen, no workers were in the house, and it was pitch black. Lucky us, two coordinators of Marttinen, Antti and Sami, stayed to give us a welcome and a small introduction. The previous volunteer, Imre, still had one week left. So, he joined them to help us settle in. Then it happened.

We had been talking in the cottage that would soon become our house, but after Imre gave us the sheets for our beds. He called my name and told me that I was going to sleep somewhere else. At first, it didn’t really bother me, but as soon as we stepped outside and I saw the darkness again, I realized: “Sh*t, I don’t want to be alone.”

Imre brought me to the accommodation of Antintalo, where there are two rooms. I stayed in one room, and he stayed in the other. I remember exactly what I felt when I entered my room. I was conflicted. On one hand, I was thankful to have a room to myself, very much so. On the other hand, though, it felt so lonely, quiet, and dark that my first thought was: “Mama, what am I doing here? I wanna go back.” I said that out loud, looking around my room, speechless. I couldn’t fathom the fact that I was going to spend seven months in such a depressive mood. Back then, I tried to block all these negative thoughts. So, I started getting ready to meet the guys again because Marttinen had prepared dinner for us in the cottage. The funny thing is, before leaving my room, Imre told me to knock on his door if I got lost trying to find the way to their cottage, and I said: “No, it’s fine, it’s not far.” 

The cottage was not even 500m away from the accommodation in Antintalo, but it was so dark that I couldn’t find the way. Not even ten steps outside, and I was crying inside because I feared the dark and getting lost. So, I returned to my room in Antintalo, famished and depressed. I felt bad to knock on Imre’s door because I thought he would be resting or sleeping. So, I just stayed in my room doing nothing. Minutes later, I received a message from Helena asking me if I wasn’t going to come for dinner. Listen to me, when I tell you the kind of happiness I felt when I saw her message… it was breathtaking! I was exhilarated. I don’t think I have ever felt so much relief. I called her and told her that I got lost trying to go to the cottage. She sent me their location, so I went outside again. I walked a bit, and I found the right place, but I didn’t find the entrance. Helena called me again and gave me directions to find the way. I walked around clueless until I saw Matti on the terrace of their cottage. He saw me first and started waving like crazy for me to see him. Then I figured out where the door was and joined them inside. The cottage was full of light, and all of them were sitting at the table with food prepared. That view helped me forget all the negative thoughts that were still haunting me in my mind. The food was good, we talked, and we laughed.

This memory of my beginning at Marttinen felt like I was returning home to my family, and they were waiting for me to eat and spend quality time together.

They gave me hope to look forward to these seven months. I think that will always be my favorite moment here in Marttinen.

I wanted to tell you this because I thought it was perfect for the second entry of this blog. It depicts my very beginning in this beautiful place with these beautiful people. So, yeah. I’m good, now! No more depression or fear of the dark, don’t worry.

XO,

10.03.2026

Hi, guys! What's up?

I'm actually ashamed I haven't written as much as I wanted to. If you could only look into my thoughts to understand how incredible this journey was... but you can't. So, I'll lock in and deliver as many stories as possible for you. The following entries will be very random. I don't want to leave without documenting on this blog every single situation that touched my heart. I'll leave without regrets. You will find out soon enough why, but the reason can wait. We still have time together through this blog. 

Today, I only want to write down some memories that still make me unbelievably happy.

The first time, Päivi (the receptionist) called me by my name. *I'm laughing all goofy right now.* Some people might think this is dumb or stupid, but to me, it's beautiful to be called by name. Especially if you think the person doesn't know your name at all, but one day out of nowhere, not only do they know your name, but they say it perfectly, as well. That's what happened.

Päivi is a lovely receptionist, super nice and helpful, but we don't work together, which is why I thought she wouldn't know my name. Moreover, my name is not the easiest to say or remember for a Finn. I didn't expect anything, and I wouldn't have blamed her at all for not knowing my name.

It was in the morning. I was sitting around in my usual corner. At this point, I believe everybody knows they can find me there anytime. I was sitting there concentrated on my phone when I heard the soft voice of someone calling my name: "Good morning, Jaineba."

At first, I was confused because I couldn't recognize the voice, but once I turned around to see the person... it was Päivi! My face went from a full death stare to a smile from ear to ear. As soon as I saw her face, I answered her immediately, and she smiled at me and left to keep working at the reception desk.

I swear to you that it was like encountering an angel. I can't recall what I was doing in that moment, but I remember that I was tired and pissed off at something. To hear Päivi call me by my name for the first time and greet me so kindly healed me that morning.

The most shocking fact about this situation is that she only saw my back. Instead of just walking past me because I couldn't see her, she recognized me and talked to me. This woman is amazing. Every morning, if she is already in the reception when we start working, the first thing you hear is her excited and lovely "Moi Moi" (Hello in Finnish) or "Huomenta" (Good morning in Finnish). She's the kind of person who lifts your whole mood just by looking at them, and the type of coworker you will never want to lose because she fills the workplace with happiness.

She will probably never read this. I'm fine with that, but I still want to tell her: "Thank you so much, Päivi! You inspire me to be the kind of person who spreads love and kindness with every step I take."

By the way, Ramadan started last month on the 18th. I have been fasting, of course. That's why I have to leave you now, guys. The time to break my fast is soon, and I have to cook rice. I'll continue with the memories in the next entries! 

XOXO,

yours Jaineba